Sitting with the discomfort of not knowing what is next
What to do when you don't have to please others?
“Nobody needs to ask what Marloes is going to do—she knows since she was four," said my classmate while we were standing in the hallway at lunch break.
We were 18 years old and about to graduate high school. And while some classmates were still unsure about whether they’d go to university or college, I didn’t even have to have one sleepless night over it. I was going to art school and had set my mind on this when I was nine years old. Back then, my older cousin wanted to go to art school, and she painted this picture of a magical place where you got to draw all day. That was settled then, I was going there!
Even when I was just a little girl, I loved telling stories, but at age four, I couldn’t write. So, I drew. All day I was telling my stories on paper, with little scribbles and prehistoric emojis.
When you do something a lot and put in the hours, you get better at it. When you’re lucky, you get really good at it. By the time I was nine, my teacher praised me for being so good at drawing, being able to draw in perspective, and adding shadows to my still lives.
The effect of praising a child who’s terribly insecure, gets bullied every day, and has a hard time at home is like magic syrup. It boosted my confidence. Finally, something I was doing right. All I needed to do was focus on what I was good at, and all would be okay.
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